FANFICTION - Tell me how you lost me - Chapter 23

 Riya’s POV

My married life was far from what I had imagined it to be. Satoshi and I would only get to see each other during breakfast and during the times when he did not have to work during weekends, which was next to never. But nevertheless that did not stop me from continuing to watch him sleep. That usually made my day complete.

There were drastic changes since the day the rest of the members found out about us. There were rules I had to live by. Rules that sounded stupid if you ask me, but I could not really do anything about it.

Everyday, Satoshi would enumerate those rules as if there were the rosary’s litany.

No talking to strangers --- hello, no need to reiterate that. My mom taught me that when I was a kid.

Always wear a cap and sunglasses --- this rule I don’t understand. I’m not an idol, so I don’t think I need to hide my face.

Don’t make any detours --- I don’t get this either. If I can’t take any detours, can I make a shortcut then?

Don’t talk to any reporters --- again let me repeat. I AM NOT AN IDOL!!!

Never go to crowded places ---- WHY? WHY? WHY? By the way, is the grocery considered a crowded place?

Don’t ride the train ---- why shouldn’t I? Riding a taxi’s really expensive.

Don’t go out of the house when not necessary --- Why do I get the feeling that I am more of prisoner than a wife?

Don’t answer the phone when it rings --- Why don’t we just have the phone line cut off?

Don’t talk to the neighbors --- what makes you think I can even talk to the neighbors (refer to rule #7).

Don’t call Satoshi’s cellphone --- even on emergencies? Well, can I call Nino then? I guess he did not give me his number for nothing.

And the list would go on. Even though the rest of the rules were just different versions of the first 10, Satoshi would meticulously repeat them before he leaves.

For almost 4 months, my life became so rigid that I ended up making a schedule of my daily routine.

4:50 ---- wake up and watch Satoshi sleep for 5 minutes
4:55 – 5:20 --- prepare breakfast
5:20 – 5:40 --- take a quick bath (wake Satoshi up before going to the bathroom)
5:45 – 6:00 --- have breakfast (while listening to the LITANY)
6:15 ---- go to work
7:00 – 4:00 --- WORK
4:20 --- go home
4:30 --- pass by the grocery (remember don’t talk to strangers)
5:45 --- have a quick bath
6:10 ---- start preparing dinner
7:00 --- watch TV (my favorite part of the day!)
8:00 --- eat dinner… ALONE
8:45 --- wash dishes, clean the kitchen, leave Satoshi’s food on the table, prepare his clothes
9:20 --- read a few pages from a book (or until I fall asleep)

Then the cycle would then repeat from the beginning. It was so routine that I would have gladly welcomed something unusual. Well I should have been more careful with what I had wished for.

It was our company’s busiest week since it was the time for the management’s yearly approval of new projects and the department that I belonged to was not spared. For almost 2 weeks I would go on overtime just to meet the deadline for the presentation. I was not even sure if I had ever been asleep for the past week. Most of my co-workers would comment on how much weight I’ve lost and how I looked like a zombie. My boss even offered to give me a week off but I declined. If they only knew that I would rather stay in the office, where I get to talk to someone, than at home.

We were just getting ready for the presentation when I suddenly felt lightheaded but I just ignored it and went on with the preparations. I was halfway through the presentation when it began to feel more intense. It was as if my head was filled with air. Everybody in the boardroom began looking all fuzzy and distorted. I held on to the side of the podium to keep myself from fainting.

“Riya-chan? Daijobou desu ka?” One of my co-workers asked as she came near me.

“Hai.” I lied as I continued with my presentation.

However I haven’t even finished the sentence when my body betrayed me and succumbed to the unwanted feeling that I have been ignoring for the past hour.

The next thing I remember was waking up at our company clinic 30 minutes later.

“Oh good you’re awake. How are you feeling?” The resident physician asked upon seeing that I was awake.

“Fine I guess, just a little dizzy.” I replied as I began to sit up.

“ Well your vitals seem normal, and I’ve taken a blood sample and sent it to the lab. The results should be delivered in a few minutes. Other than the fact that you seem really fatigued, there seems to be nothing wrong except…”

“Except what doctor?” I asked.

“Well I just need to confirm something. Here, the instructions inside, the bathroom’s over there. I’m sure you’d figure out how to do this.” She said as she handed me a box.

I was not stupid not to recognize the box. I had not spent four years in Nursing school for nothing. I looked at the doctor anxiously as I took the box from her. She gave me a weak smile and nodded towards the bathroom.

I sluggishly got out of the bed and headed towards the bathroom. The faint feeling that I had awhile ago seem to be coming back as I took the kit out of the box.

My hands began to tremble as I handed the test back to the doctor.

“Do you know what this means or do you want me to interpret it for you?” She asked.

“It’s ok. I know what it means.” I replied softly.

“Well, I guess I should say congratulations. By the way do you have an OB-GYN? I think you should start seeing one. Here, she’s the company’s retainer OB-GYN. You can visit her anytime, no need to make an appointment.” She said as she handed me a calling card.

I absentmindedly took the card from her, thanked her and headed out of the door.

A lot of hows, whens, whys and whatifs were running through my head as I walked back to my cubicle. How stupid can I be that I did realize what was going on with my own body? How could I not know? What’s going to happen now? What am I going to do? How am I going to tell Satoshi? How is he going to react?

I was still in a state of shock when my boss approached me.

“Riya? Diajobou?” he asked

“Ha… hai…” I replied.

“ I think it’s better if you take the day off. I know you’ve been through a lot of pressure for the past week. The rest of the guys can take it from here.” He said sympathetically.

I nodded as I began to clear my desk. I took my bag and headed out.

I was standing outside the company building for almost 10 minutes still contemplating on what to do when my phone began to ring.
Satoshi.

“Hai…” I said in a soft voice as I answered the phone.

“Riya? Doko desu ka?” he asked.

“I’m still in the office.” I lied.

“ Oh… well I’m just checking if you had your lunch already. By the way, I’ll be late tonight. We ‘re filming a special for the show.”

“Ok. Take care.”

“You too. Don’t work too hard.” He said before the line went dead.

I stared at my phone for a few more minutes before hailing a cab.

I took the calling card out of my bag and looked at the address written on it. The clinic was just a few minutes away from the office that I decided to go and see the doctor.

My check up lasted for 30 minutes. I was informed that I was more or less 2 months on the way. The doctor then began enumerating the “Dos” and “Don’ts” but I was not attentively listening. All I ever did was nod. She began to write down a prescription of different vitamins that I must take.

I was continuously in a state of shock when I got out of the clinic.

I was too engrossed with formulating the correct “surprise” sentence for Satoshi when I heard my name being called.

“R-I-Y-A!!!!!”

I began looking for the familiar voice that was echoing. My mouth hang open when I saw who owned the voice.

Aiba.

“Riya. What are you doing here?” he asked as he approached me.

“Anou… I was…” I stuttered.

This is bad. I thought. He mustn’t know.

“You came from the clinic?” he asked again.

“ No… I…” I could not find an appropriate alibi no matter how hard I tried.

“OHHHHH!!!!” he exclaimed. His eyes were twinkling with excitement.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing.” He replied with a silly grin painted on his face.

“What are you doing here anyway? Don’t you have work?” I asked again.

“ I’m on my way to work. I just dropped my mom off. She’s having her CHECK – UP.” He replied, putting emphasis on the word check up.

“I see. Off you go then. You’ll be late.” I said as I pushed him away.

Satoshi’s POV.

Filming should have started a few minutes ago but we were still in the dressing room waiting for the ultimate member to arrive. It was sort of unusual of him to be late. Most of the time it was Jun who would make us wait. I wonder what his alibi would be. I was starting to think of something funny that he would say when door opened with a bang.

“ Minna… gomen ne…” he said in between breaths.

“Baka! We should have started 30 minutes ago.” Jun irritatingly said as he stood up from the sofa.

“ Gomen… gomen… I had to drop off my mom.” Aiba replied as he began to change.

“A likely excuse.” Nino commented.

“It’s true. I had to drop off my mom at the clinic. I’m not lying. Ask Riya-chan.” He said as he struggled with his pants.

“Riya?” I surprisingly asked upon hearing Riya’s name.

“Yes. I saw her at the clinic.”

“What clinic?” Nino asked curiously.

“The clinic where I dropped my mom off.” He replied.

“Yes, you’ve been repeating that you dropped your mom off at the clinic. But what clinic?” Nino asked again.

“Oh that… you know the clinic for women… the one where the go to when they’re pregnant or when they’re nearing old age and entering menopause.” He replied bluntly.

“Come to think of it, if Riya did come from that clinic and she isn’t entering menopause, then she must be…” Aiba said stopping at the last word and looking at me suspiciously.

“What?” I asked.

“Riida… it’s ok to tell us… you know… if you…” he continued.

“If I what?” I asked him sounding confused.

“Been doing it. It’s normal. You’re married.”

“Masaki! You are the most perverted person I have ever met in my entire life!” I shouted as I threw the towel at him.

“ No, I’m not! Sho-kun is!” he replied.

“Oi! Why am I being dragged into this conversation?” Sho reacted as he peeped behind the newspaper he was reading.

“Ohno-kun…” A small voice from behind me called.

I turned around and saw Nino.

“Nani?” I asked him.

“What if it’s true?” He asked.

“What do you mean?”

“What if she really is pregnant?” He asked back.

“What are you saying? Are you out of your mind? It’s not going to happen.” I said confidently.

“There is a big possibility.” Jun commented.

“There is no possibility! We’re careful. Riya is careful.” I shot back.

“Who are you trying to convince? Us or yourself?” Sho asked as he stood up and walked towards me.

“That’s not going to happen.” I said

“Why? Are you impotent?” Nino asked sarcastically.

“Of course not! I just know it’s not going to happen.”

“What if it happens? What are you going to do?” Jun asked.

I fell silent.

“Satoshi-kun, there is nothing wrong if Riya is pregnant. We’re not stupid to ask you to do something bad.” Sho said.

“Sho’s right. Don’t people usually say that having kids is a blessing?” Jun added.

“I don’t want to…” I said softly.

“Nani?” Nino asked.

“I don’t want to. I don’t want to have kids.” I said looking away from them.

“Nande?” Sho asked.

I could not get myself to answer Sho’s question. I know it’s a selfish reason, but I really don’t want her to get pregnant.

“Ohno-kun… nande?” Jun repeated the question.

“I don’t want to have kids. Is that too hard to understand?” I replied sounding annoyed.

“Ok. Let’s just drop the topic. We have the whole night to film and it’s not good to be on each other’s nerves. Let’s go.” Sho said finally breaking the tension.

We were on the way out when we noticed Aiba sitting on the sofa, deep in thought.

“Aiba-san, what’s wrong?” Sho asked.

“How?” he asked.

“What do you mean how?” Jun asked.

“How did Riida get Riya pregnant when we have been really busy with the concert, shows and recordings? Unless Riida would sneak out. So, how? How did he get her pregnant?” he asked.

“AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” our voices echoed in the room.